Hello and welcome to another week of University Challenge, the show in which people just out of their nappies display incredible knowledge on the most dullest subjects imaginable, putting their parents to shame whilst leaving the rest of us to gawp open mouthed at such intellect… and bad haircuts.
This week we see a slight change to the standard line-up as team Kelly Slater enters the fray (I say slight change as it appears the World Surfing Champion has somehow cloned himself many times over and now wants to spend his spare time reciting the square route of pie to 103 decimal places).
Paxman: YOUR STARTER FOR 10 GENERALLY REGARDED AS THE SMALLEST OF ALL MAMMALS, THE PYGMY WHITE TOOTHED OR ETRUSCAN IS A SPECIES OF WHICH MOUSE-LIKE INSECTIVORE BELONGING TO THE FAMILY ‘SORICIDAE’?
Kay Corpus Christi: Field mouse?
Paxman: (Condescending) NO
Slater Team Slater: Stoked?
Paxman: IN MUSLIM ART AND CULTURE, WHAT ARE NASKHI, RUKAH AND KUFIC?
Slater Team Slater: Surf Gurus?
Paxman: MIKE LEIGH’S FILM ‘TOPSY-TURVY’ IS AN ACCOUNT OF GILBERT AND SULLIVAN’S UNEASY COLLABORATION ON WHICH OF THEIR WORKS?
Slater Team Slater: Big Wednesday?
Well it’s better than the real thing…